Love Angel Kurumi
by Hawk
Summary: When the gang stumbles into the forgotten tunnels beneath Hinata Sou, Keitaro stumbles across Moe, right? Well, not this time. This girl answers to another name. The name, you ask? Kurumi. Steel Angel Kurumi.
1. One

Love Angel Kurumi PG-13  
Niklas "Hawk" Jonsson 

Summary: When the gang stumbles into the forgotten tunnels beneath Hinata Sou, Keitaro stumbles across Moe, right? Well, not this time. This girl answers to another name. The name, you ask? Kurumi. Steel Angel Kurumi.

Disclaimer: Love Hina, Hinata Sou and whatnot are not mine, though I certainly wish they were. The story is mine though, all mine. This story deals with some very unpleasant things. If this disturbs you, don't read.  
If the layout looks screwy or symbols seems to be missing, you're probably reading the quickedit-mangled version of this fic on ff dot net, if it grates on your nerves too much, read it on hawksgalaxy dot com or something.

Feedback/Flames: Yes, please. Both of them are equally fun to read, although I must admit that I greatly prefer the first variety. :)  
I can be found on ICQ as 21771860, MSN Messenger/E-mail as iamhawk at yahoo dotcom, though not very frequently as real life lately interferes with my online existance more then I'd like. More stories are available at my nifty lil' site at hawksgalaxy dot com or by clicking on my handle up above.

"speech"  
emphasis/shouts/Kindred Domination/post-hypnotic triggers  
/thoughts/  
/telepathy/  
translation  
+soundeffect/radio/telephone conversation/TV+

Author Hastily Removes the Ballgag Put There To Prevent Author Rants 

What if... Together, these two words is the most creativity-inducing phrase in my vocabulary.

I constantly think in terms of 'What if' when I'm watching/reading anime/manga and this is the way most of my crazy ideas spring to life. This is especially true after a couple of beers and/or some fine whisky.

The what if that popped into my head for this particular story was... What if the doll/robot/android/whatever Keitaro found wasn't Moe? What if it was... Someone else... This sparked a whole slew of ideas, with crossovers with Chobits, Buttobi CPU, Hand Maid May and a few others. Then it came to me. What if what Keitaro found was someone say, like, Kurumi?

Oh my! There was nothing for it but to start writing straightaway, as I was suddenly overwhelmed with all sorts of amusing imagery. :P

Speaking of 'Oh my!', recently I received a review that touched whatever part of this dark twisted old demented heart of mine that is still capable of feeling human emotions. "... keep on writing... at this point, I don't think I care which of your fics you update, as long as you do." is the note it finished on. Y'know, I think I can die happy now. This is precisely my own take on things when it comes to my favourite authors and to think that someone actually feels the same way about me truly warms my heart.

I don't care which story Random1377, dave-d or DB Sommer updates, as long as they do continue to belt out updates on old stories or first chapters to entirely new stories. Sure, I'd be happy as a pig in mud if I got a sequel to Vacation days or more of Aijou & Aitou, but as long as my favourites do continue to write, I'll be happy anyways.

Ballgag Reinserted By Muscular Woman In A Nurse Outfit 

* * *

Chapter One:

"Hm, what's this?" Keitaro mumbled to himself, pulling at the tarp covering up something standing against a wall in the dusty room he'd stumbled into during the exploration of the mysterious tunnel system underneath Hinata Sou. Slowly dragging the tarp forward, Keitaro gasped as his pulling on the tarp made the object hidden underneath suddenly topple forward. A cloud of dust rose into the air and Keitaro stumbled back as a series of coughs racked his body.

His moving, while still holding on to the tarp, soon revealed what had been hidden underneath the dusty tarp. He could faintly make out something vaguely human-shaped through the cloud of dust, but as the dust slowly settled or drifted elsewhere, a pretty pink-haired girl who had been hidden behind the dust slowly appeared.

"AAAahhh!" Keitaro exclaimed and took several steps back. "A corpse!" he added and made frantic signs with his hands to ward off evil spirits.

Then he blinked, as a notion struck him.

Dust. Spider webs.

That had been all over the tarp. The girl had to have been underneath it for quite a while, yet...

If a corpse had been left alone for as long as this one had to have been, surely it wouldn't look so... Fresh? There was no sign of decomposision, except for the ratty clothes she wore. The girl herself looked remarkably well preserved.

So, not a corpse then.

Keitaro let out a huge relieved breath and felt his heart starting to beat at a more normal pace, as he mentally berated himself for being so easily excitable. He slowly approached the prone figure, moving closer and carefully putting two fingers against the neck. It did not feel like skin. It was more... Slippery and less giving, more solid somehow. Some sort of weird plastic?

/A doll? Yeah, a mannequin of some sort./ he reasoned and thus completely relaxed, as his fears had been lifted.

Keitaro grabbed it by its shoulders, then heaved. It was astonishingly heavy, but with a bit of effort, he managed to make it stand up on its own again like it had before he started pulling on the tarp.

"Wow..." he mumbled to himself, as he took a step back and looked the doll over. It was so life-like that it was scary. Except for the clothes, which were in various stages of decomposition, it looked as if a human girl had just fallen asleep in an upright position and could wake up at any moment. He reached out and touched the dolls face. It didn't feel quite like plastic and it certainly didn't feel anything like human skin. He wondered just what it was made of and why it was so heavy.

"No, no, no. Stay." he said, as the doll suddenly toppled forward again. He put out both hands and attempted to hold her back. True to his usual form when it came to being hands-on with girls, his hands wound up attaching themselves to her rather well-endowed female attributes. Though he knew that it wasn't a real girl, his body still reacted in an unconscious instinctive reaction gained from staying with the girls of Hinata Sou for all this time. He removed his hands just as quickly as if they had been burned, an apology already on his lips. But without anything holding her upright, the doll continued to topple forward and the two of them crashed together. "I'm sor-mglf!" Keitaro started, his apology cut off as his lips made contact with those of the doll.

/They feel so... Real.../ he thought, before he went down, the doll smashing him down onto the ground.

"Ouff!" he grunted, then blinked. Wasn't the doll heavier then this, just moments ago? Now she felt no heavier then any other girl her size, and he now had lots of experience in having girls of various sizes falling on top of him, feeling their weight pressing him down, so he should know. "What the..." he started, then gasped, as he saw that her eyes were open. And moving!

"Ohhh, Kurumi feels... Master? Master!" the doll suddenly said, then wrapped her arms around him. "Master! Kurumi is so happy!" she cheerfully exclaimed, then kissed him.

Very enthusiastically!

"Mglmmmmmm!" Keitaro tried to speak up, but was muted by her lips against his. "Hey!" Keitaro protested as he tore away his lips from hers. "What... Who... Where... Why... Who are you? What are you?" Keitaro babbled, shocked, astonished and surprised at this odd turn of events. /Warm/ he reflected, as he took note of the messages his hand was sending him. His right hand was held against her neck, and it was warm. And soft. And smooth. It felt like human skin now, when it hadn't before/What's going on/

"Silly master. Kurumi is Kurumi." Kurumi informed him.

"Why are you calling me master?" Keitaro asked in a shrill, girlish voice.

"Silly master. Master is master. Master is Kurumis master, so of course Kurumi calls master master." she replied.

"Well, stop it." he requested. "I'm Keitaro, Urashima Keitaro." he continued, then stifled a gasp as he felt one of her legs brush up against a rather sensitive part of his anatomy. "Could you... Perhaps... Get off me?" he asked her.

"Sure." she happily responded, then hastily got up and helped him into an upright position. "Anything for my Keitaro-sama." she assured him.

"Just Keitaro will be fine." Keitaro told her, wondering if he had been knocked unconscious and was having some sort of concussion-induced dream. He had to be hallucinating this. He was having a conversation with a doll, after all. "Again, what's with this master business? I'm nobody's master."

"You activated me. The one who activates me, is my master." Kurumi explained. "You activated me, so..." she prompted, drawing it out.

"So, I'm your master?" Keitaro hesitantly inquired.

"Bingo!" Kurumi cheered. "Oh, you are so clever, master!" she gushed, stars in her eyes as she stared adoringly at him with her hands clasped between her breasts.

"Heh, heh. Well, I don't know about that." he chuckled sheepishly. This was certainly a nice change of pace to being beat on, ridiculed and fleeced by the various tenants of the Hinata Sou. Not even Shinobu was this enthusiastic regarding him. "Wait. What do you mean, activated?" he inquired.

"Kurumi is a Steel Angel." she exclaimed happily, saw the confused look on his face and tried again. "Kurumi is an android, a human-like robot. Master activated me."

"But... How? I didn't do anything." Keitaro said.

"It must have been the power of love!" Kurumi enthusiastically exclaimed, gazing lovingly at him.

"Love?" Keitaro dumbly repeated.

"Of course. It must have been our undying love for each other that awoke me." Kurumi explained, raising a clenched fist towards the skies.

"But... We just met?" Keitaro ventured.

"Love and fate, cares little for such things when soul mates are involved. It was destiny that brought us together." she gushed.

"Ah." Keitaro stated his non-commitment to the notion. It was his experience that it was more work then it was worth to make a woman change her mind once she was dead set on something. If it was at all possible to begin with, the ones he shared a roof with could certainly be unreasonable about certain things. He didn't think Kurumi would be any different, just because hers was a female robotic mind. "Well, ah, I think I'll be getting out of here." he continued.

"Of course. This dusty old room is no place for my master. Who knows what sort of nasty germs could sneak up on you in these surroundings!" Kurumi approved, then grabbed hold of his right arm, nestling it between her breasts as she slid up against him.

"You're... Coming with me?" Keitaro guessed out loud.

"Of course. Kurumi's place is by her master's side." she announced.

"Of course..." Keitaro mumbled and left the room in a daze, Kurumi by his side, neither of them noticing that her decomposed clothes were slowly falling into pieces in their wake.

* * *

"Urashima, you enemy of women! What nonsense have you put into this poor girls head, to make her walk naked by your side!" Motoko bellowed, as Keitaro and Kurumi emerged from the tunnels and into the living room.

"Huh?" Keitaro asked nonplussed, before he glanced aside and saw that Kurumi was indeed naked now as her clothes had vanished completely from her gorgeous body somewhere along the way. His nostrils turned into twin fountains of blood and he would have staggered backwards away from Kurumi, if she hadn't refused to let go of his arm, which was tucked in between two very visually appealing protrusions located on her upper torso.

"Master!" Kurumi cried out, dragging Keitaro into a fierce hug. "What's wrong, master!"

"Gaaaaaahhhhhh." Keitaro groaned, his gaze dipping down to the cleavage pressed against him. "Gaaaaaahhhhhh." he groaned again, a silly grin on his face as another spurt of blood erupted from his nose.

"Master!" Kurumi cried out again. "What can I do? What can I do?" she worried out loud.

"I believe letting him go, and putting on some clothes, might help." Motoko snarled, pulled Keitaro away from Kurumi, tossed him carelessly towards the couch and then dragged Kurumi out of the room, under her frantic protests at being separated from her master.

When Kurumi came running back into the room, now dressed in some of Motoko's clothes, her gaze instantly went to Keitaro, and his went directly to her. The size of the clothes was more or less correct, but the fact that Kurumi didn't believe in chest bindings was blatantly obvious, as her breasts threatened to burst Motoko's shirt right open.

"Master! Oh, you're all better!" she cried out, then launched herself at Keitaro who stood in front of the couch with a confused look on his face.

"Oh, it wasn't a drea-gnff!" Keitaro attempted to say, but cut himself off with a grunt as Kurumi slammed into him, causing both of them to fall into the couch, where Keitaro found himself the victim of a crushing hug, while Kurumi rubbed her cheeks against his face like an over-sized kitten OD:ing on catnip.

"Urashima, I demand to know who this person is and why is she refers to you as 'master'. Explain!" Motoko demanded, glaring down at the couple with a disapproving look. "Now." she added, her left eyebrow jerking erratically up and down.

"I'm not sure what to say. I found her in the tunnels beneath Hinata Sou. She says that she's an android named Kurumi." Keitaro nervously replied, eyeing Motoko's Katana with a leery look.

"I am!" Kurumi cheerfully agreed. "I'm Kurumi, Urashima Keitaro-sama is my master and I'll do everything he asks me."

"Uh? Everything?" Keitaro repeated uncertainly.

"Everything! For you, master, everything." Kurumi gushed.

"Urashima. You are thinking about something perverted again." Motoko cautioned him, fingering the handle of her bokken.

"How did you kn... I mean, I am not!" he protested, gesturing wildly with his hands and shaking his head frantically for emphasis, desperately trying to dispel the image of sharing a bath with a naked Kurumi as she lathered him up and washed him all over.

With her more then ample chest instead of her hands.

"Urashima!" Motoko growled and drew her wooden sword, which caused Keitaro to slide out from underneath Kurumi and bolt. "Stand fast and take your punishment like a man, you weakling!" Motoko cried out and prepared to rush after him, when she suddenly found herself standing nose-to-nose with Kurumi.

"You weren't thinking about hurting my master, were you?" Kurumi stated ominously. "That would make me mad. You wouldn't like me mad." she declared.

"Stand aside! That molesting pervert needs to be punished." Motoko ordered, then tried to step around Kurumi, only to have the android move into the way once again.

"You are trying to hurt my master." Kurumi said. "That's UNFORGIVEABLE." she declared, the capital letters of that word clearly audible.

"That weakling is not fit to be anyone's master." Motoko snorted. "Come to your senses!"

"My master is no weakling! He is strong, handsome, kind and wonderful! He is the best master in the world!" Kurumi declared. "Stop saying such nasty things about him!"

"Urashima, you demented brainwasher! I shall put an end to this nonsense straightaway!" Motoko shouted, tucked the sword into her belt, gathered Ki in her hands and grasped Kurumi's head. "I shall make you see the truth of the matter." Motoko swore, then prepared to rid Kurumi of the brainwashing she must have gone through in order to see Keitaro as strong, handsome and kind and herself as an android, whatever the heck that was. "KiiiiiiiiyyyaaaaaaAAAARGH!" Motoko bellowed, her fierce battle-cry changing to a pained exclamation mid-way through her attempt to cleanse Kurumi's mind.

ZAKT+

"AAAArgh!" Motoko cried out as she flew back from a surprised Kurumi, from which arcs and blue bolts of pure power danced. Kurumi whimpered and staggered backwards, clutching her head with a pained expression. Motoko landed flat on her ass on the ground, twitching as her body was wracked by the electrical discharge.

"Ouff!" Kurumi grunted, as she too collapsed to the ground, unable to remain upright.

"Imp... I... Impossible..." Motoko managed to gasp out, as she slowly drew herself up into a sitting position, looking incredulously at Kurumi. "Y... You're not... Human."

"Master told you, didn't he?" Kurumi responded as she slowly sat up, rubbing the back of her head. "Kurumi is a Steel Angel!" she announced proudly as she rose to her feet.

"B-but... How did he... Why do you... He's a perverted male! Why are you acknowledging him as your master?" Motoko demanded.

"Master is Kurumi's master." Kurumi cheerfully responded. "And a wonderful master he is! Kurumi really loves her master."

"Why is he your master?" Motoko tried.

"The one who activates me, is my master. Urashima Keitaro-sama activated Kurumi, so he is Kurumi's master." Kurumi promptly informed Motoko.

"How did he activate you?" Motoko prompted, thinking that perhaps it would be for the best if the demented android could be shut down permanently. Or if not that, then at least shut down and then activated by someone less perverted then Urashima.

"It was the power of our burning love for each other that activated Kurumi! Kurumi is certain of it!" Kurumi dreamily responded, causing Motoko to grunt in disbelief, before she toppled over onto her back again.

* * *

"So, let me get this straight." Haruka said as the entire gang had been rounded up to meet the new 'resident' at the Hinata Sou and Keitaro had explained her rather peculiar nature. "You found this 'Steel Angel' in the secret tunnels underneath Hinata Sou. Somehow, she got activated by you and proclaimed you her master. She believes that the two of you are in love. She protects you from the girls, refusing to let them do you any harm. She is willing to do anything you ask of her." she repeated. "Got any of that wrong? No? All right. Congratulations, Keitaro." she finished and reached for her pack of fags.

"Congratulations!" Keitaro exclaimed. "Congratulations for what!"

"You found a girl who loves you, will do anything for you and won't let any of the tenants harm you. I believe congratulations are in order." Haruka explained and extracted a cigarette from the pack, flipping it up into her mouth with practised ease. "Sure, you won't get any kids with her. But other then that, you've found the perfect girl for you."

* * *

"Oh, boy. What a day." Keitaro grunted as he sank into the warm water in his barrel. He closed his eyes and allowed most of the tension to just slither off, washed away by the cleansing hot bath.

"Hello, master." Kurumi greeted him as she strolled through the door, closed it behind her and walked up to the barrel as if she didn't have a care in the world.

"Wh-w-w-wh-w-wh-wha-w-w-wha-wh-w-what are you d-d-do-doing he-h-here?" Keitaro stuttered. "What are you doing!" he further demanded as Kurumi started to remove her clothes.

"Kurumi is joining master! I'll wash you, master." she proclaimed and finished stripping, stepping out of her panties with an eager expression. "I'll make sure that you're all clean, master." she promised with determination shining from her eyes.

"Whah-wh-wha-HEY!" Keitaro stuttered as she emptied a bucked of water over herself, then climbed into the barrel with him, straddling one of his legs as she did so.

"Don't worry, master. Kurumi knows what to do. Kurumi used to bathe all the time with master Daisuke." she revealed, then pressed herself up against Keitaro and wrapped her arms around him, her chest pressed against his. A split second later, Keitaro slipped into unconsciousness and the water in the barrel started turning red as blood gushed out of his nose.

The End! ( For now... )


	2. Two

Love Angel Kurumi PG-13  
Niklas "Hawk" Jonsson

Summary: When the gang stumbles into the forgotten tunnels beneath Hinata Sou, Keitaro stumbles across Moe, right? Well, not this time. This girl answers to another name. The name, you ask? Kurumi. Steel Angel Kurumi.

Disclaimer: Love Hina, Hinata Sou and whatnot are not mine, though I certainly wish they were. The story is mine though, all mine. This story deals with some very unpleasant things. If this disturbs you, don't read.  
If the layout looks screwy or symbols seems to be missing, you're probably reading the quickedit-mangled version of this fic on ff dot net, if it grates on your nerves too much, read it on hawksgalaxy dot com or something.

Feedback/Flames: Yes, please. Both of them are equally fun to read, although I must admit that I greatly prefer the first variety. :)  
I can be found on ICQ as 21771860, MSN Messenger/E-mail as iamhawk at yahoo dot com, though not very frequently as real life lately interferes with my online existance more then I'd like. More stories are available at my nifty lil' site at hawksgalaxy dot com or by clicking on my handle up above.

"speech"  
emphasis/shouts/Kindred Domination/post-hypnotic triggers  
/thoughts/  
/telepathy/  
translation  
+soundeffect/radio/telephone conversation/TV+

Previously, on 'Love Angel Kurumi'

"Oh, boy. What a day." Keitaro grunted as he sank into the warm water in his barrel. He closed his eyes and allowed most of the tension to just slither off, washed away by the cleansing hot bath.

"Hello, master." Kurumi greeted him as she strolled through the door, closed it behind her and walked up to the barrel as if she didn't have a care in the world.

"Wh-w-w-wh-w-wh-wha-w-w-wha-wh-w-what are you d-d-do-doing he-h-here?" Keitaro stuttered. "What are you doing?!" he further demanded as Kurumi started to remove her clothes.

"Kurumi is joining master! I'll wash you, master." she proclaimed and finished stripping, stepping out of her panties with an eager expression. "I'll make sure that you're all clean, master." she promised with determination shining from her eyes.

"Whah-wh-wha-HEY!" Keitaro stuttered as she emptied a bucked of water over herself, then climbed into the barrel with him, straddling one of his legs as she did so.

"Don't worry, master. Kurumi knows what to do. Kurumi used to bathe all the time with master Daisuke." she revealed, then pressed herself up against Keitaro and wrapped her arms around him, her chest pressed against his. A split second later, Keitaro slipped into unconsciousness and the water in the barrel started turning red as blood gushed out of his nose.

Roll credits

* * *

Chapter Two:

"Keitaroooo..."

"Mghlf. Go away, Kr'mi." Keitaro groaned in his sleep.

"Keitaroooo..." the intruding voice repeated and Keitaro opened his eyes, only to come nose to nose with the android.

Had he not expected this, he might have panicked, screamed and tried to bolt. But after the disastrous events of last night, his brain had been wired to expect the weird extremely female android to pop up in unexpected places, preferably as close to him and as naked as possible. After the horrible racket the girls had made after they discovered that Kurumi had bathed with him, another horrible row had taken place once Kurumi made it clear to everybody that she would be sleeping in his futon.

That had been horrible and Keitaro hadn't even been hurt once.

Which was exactly why the situation had been hardwired into his brain. Had only he himself been hurt, it would have been just another one in a formerly seeming never-ending series of painful events for the Ronin. But Kurumi hadn't allowed for him to be hurt and this was what had led to just why Keitaro so vividly recalled the fact that Kurumi would stay close to him, even in sleep. As Naru and Motoko had tried to bash his head in for being a pervert, Kurumi had stepped in to protect him.

The low uppercut she had nailed Naru with, had completely incapacitated the human girl. She had crumpled to the ground and spent the better part of the next five minutes alternatively puking, gasping for breath or spitting up blood-stained stomach acids. Motoko's attempt had fared no better, as Kurumi had taken her sword and thrown it so hard into one of the doorposts that the kendo girl had been unable to retrieve it. When Motoko had tried to nail him with a Red Lotus Fist instead, Kurumi had grabbed her by the scruff of her neck and thrown Motoko through the roof, creating another hole up to Naru's room right next to the original opening.

All further protests about Kurumi sleeping with Keitaro had stopped right then and there, though Shinobu had broken down in tears and ran back to her room sobbing all the while.

Keitaro felt like crying at the memory himself. He being hurt was one thing, the girls being hurt was quite another and that was the reason why his recollection of those events were so vividly ingrained into his brain. He never wanted to see something like that happening ever again and thus his reaction upon finding Kurumi in his bed was a surprisingly mild one.

"Mornin', Kurumi. What do you want?" he murmured quietly, as not to alert Naru in the room upstairs.

"I don't want anything, Master. It's that girl who's calling for you." she replied and pointed to the other side of Keitaro. He blinked and turned his head around, coming nose to nose with Kaolla.

"AH!" he briefly exclaimed, before he managed to muffle himself, slapping a hand over his mouth.

"Keitaro..." Kaolla chirped happily as she crawled on top of him, crossing her tiny little arms upon his chest and stared down at him, either not noticing or not caring that she was crushing his morning erection with her stomach. "Can I play with your android? She wouldn't let me without your permission." she pleaded and made puppy-dog eyes at him.

"Sure, fine, whatever. Just lemme sleep." Keitaro mumbled and glanced aside at his clock radio. /4:15 in the morning. It is way too early for this shit.../ he mentally groused.

"Can I take her apart and see how she works?" Kaolla inquired.

"Whatever..." Keitaro sighed and closed his eyes, before they snapped open again. "What?!"

"I wanna know what makes her tick!" Kaolla chirped. "So, please? Can I? Can I? Can I? Pleaaaaaaaase, Keitaroooooo..." she pleaded adorably with him.

"Only if it's okay with Kurumi. Whatever. Now leave me alone." Keitaro muttered and jerked aside, dropping Kaolla to the ground. "'Stoo'rly f'r iz'shit..." he mumbled and slowly drifted off to sleep again.

"Sleep tight, Master." Kurumi whispered and kissed his forehead.

"Zzzzznork..." was all Keitaro was capable of replying to that.

* * *

"Keeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiitaroooooooo!"

"Oh, Kami... What now?" Keitaro asked pitifully as he looked pleadingly up towards the roof for a few moments, before he and the rest of the girls around the kitchen table turned to face the door where moments later, Kaolla came bursting into the room. She quickly scanned the room, then leapt across the kitchen table and wrapped herself around Keitaro in a very fierce Kaolla-hug.

"Thank you, Keitaro! Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!" Kaolla chanted as she rubbed her entire body up against him in mid-hug. "Your Kurumi is amazing, both inside and outside! It was great! I've never felt this energized before in my entire life! OOOOooooohhhh, I'm like an ongoing explosion on speed!" she cheered and leapt off Keitaro and onto the table. "And I'm starving! Playing with your Kurumi makes me hungry!" she announced in a loud voice, before she pounced upon a platter of rice balls which she devoured one-by-one at a break-neck pace.

"'Amazing, both inside and outside'?" Naru quoted.

"'Playing with your Kurumi makes me hungry'?" Motoko quoted, before the two of them turned twin piercing looks in Keitaro's direction.

"Yeah, she's awesome!" Kaolla piped up, as she moved from the now empty platter to snatch a grilled fish off Kitsune's plate.

"Hey, I was going to eat that!" Kitsune protested.

"You snooze, you loose." Kaolla snorted dismissively and ate the fish whole, bones, skin, head and all. "Did you know that her energy source is at least forty-seven point eight times more effective then anything else in that size? On idle! I asked her to go for the full output and it fried all my measuring equipment before I could get a reading. It's amazing, if I can duplicate that, the world's energy problems will be solved in one fell stroke! Su Kaolla Inc will be hailed as the world's saviour!" she continued and let out an evil chuckle as befitting of an evil genius on the path of world domination. "And the servos are incredible too, way beyond today's cutting edge technology. I dunno how strong she can actually be if she puts her mind to it, but it'll be very strong! Lifting trucks and throwing them several city blocks away-strong, at the very least!" she continued and grinned manically.

"Oh Kami..." Keitaro whimpered.

"Yeah! Naru and Motoko had better play nice with Keitaro, or Keitaro's Kurumi will kill you." Kaolla agreed with a cheerful smile directed at Naru and Motoko, who looked somewhat pale and fearful. "And that armour! I had to whip out a new and more powerful version of my micro-wave laser cutter to even make a dent in it! When I've copied that, my army of Mecha-tama's will be invincible and I'll conquer the world in a flash! All the world will grovel at the dainty feet of Su Kaolla!" she finished and laughed her evil dictator laugh again.

"Uh... ... Kaolla?" Keitaro interjected cautiously.

"Yes?" Kaolla inquired as she practically inhaled a French roll dripping with banana syrup she'd made herself, which none of the tenants dared to touch any more. For some odd reason, Kaolla figured that lots of yellow curry and an extremely hot pepper paste went well with it and had added that to the syrup.

"You're scaring the other tenants... And me..." he revealed and Kaolla looked around the room with a surprised expression.

"Oh, don't worry. You can all be my faithful minions. I like you guys!" Kaolla assured them and then looked ravenously at Keitaro. "And you can be my imperial consort, keeping the bed warm at night. And day. And morning. And evening. Teh, heh, heh." she chuckled evilly with a feral gaze directed at Keitaro. "Kurumi can join too." she decided after a few moments.

"Of course. I will never part with my master." a robotic voice spoke up and the entire room turned around, only to stare in shock at what seemed like a human-sized mecha-tama with a pink head.

"K-K-Kurumi?!" Keitaro exclaimed and stared at the horrifying sight in front of him.

"Yes, Master?" the mecha-tama spoke up.

"Oh, Kami. What have you done to her, Kaolla?!" Keitaro screamed.

"That's not Kurumi. That's a Mecha-tama V2 Mark 0,5!" Kaolla replied. "It's a prototype version of an entirely new line of Mecha-Tama's!" Kaolla cheered and tilted her head consideringly, as the Mecha-tama hugged and snuggled against Keitaro. "There are some quirks and bugs to work out, however..." she muttered as the mechanical creation completely ignored its maker in favour of fussing over Keitaro.

"Master?! What are you doing with that... That... That slut?!" Kurumi exclaimed as she strolled into the kitchen, only to come to a complete stop at the sight of Keitaro snuggling up with the mecha-tama. "Get away from my master!" Kurumi snapped and hastily moved over to hug the opposite side of Keitaro from the mecha-tama.

"Let go of my master!" the mecha-tama argued, staring daggers at Kurumi.

"It's my master!" Kurumi exclaimed, glaring right back at the mecha-tama.

"It's our master. We can share?" the mecha-tama suggested and Kurumi looked consideringly at the weird creation for a few moments.

"You don't look very comfortable, too many hard surfaces. Get yourself a set of these, some soft skin and I'll think about it." Kurumi suggested and moved her right hand down to her right breast.

The mecha-tama glared at Kurumi, looking her over from top to bottom, then down at itself. It cautiously caressed its own metal plating and then turned towards Kaolla.

"You, creator! You give me a better body right this instant! I wanna be soft'n comfy for my master! I want breasts! I want hips! I want supple lips! I wanna be my masters' ultimate sexual fantasy!" the mecha-tama whined. "It's all your fault that I'm not suitable for master and I hate you!" it sobbed and kicked the table, toppling Kaolla down to the ground and launching various foodstuffs into the air.

"My breakfast!" Shinobu cried then looked between Keitaro, Kurumi and the mecha-tama. "My sempai! Waaaaah!" she cried and ran sobbing from the room.

"My... My... My... My beer... Waaaaah!" Kitsune whimpered sadly as she stared at the can of beer on the ground, its precious contents slowly spilling out over the ground. "My beer..." she sobbed as tears started trickling down her cheeks.

"Urashima..." Motoko growled.

"Keitaro..." Naru growled.

"Don't even think about hurting my master!" Kurumi and the mecha-tama shouted in chorus as they put themselves between the two angry females and Keitaro. Kurumi looked scary enough with the frown on her pretty face, but the mecha-tama was even worse, as formerly hidden hatches and compartments were revealed, missile launchers, laser rifles and gattling guns popping out and aiming themselves at the two irate girls.

"My creation hates me!" Kaolla sobbed on the ground.

"My formerly peaceful existence... Gone! Waaaah!" Keitaro sobbed and broke down in tears as well.

"Oh, my..." Mutsumi commented from her seat, protectively holding the watermelon that had been resting on her plate before the mecha-tama kicked the table in a careful embrace, protecting it with her body.

"You can say that again..." Haruka sighed as she lit up another cigarette before the last one had even been extinguished. It was just one of those days.

And knowing Keitaro and his luck, no doubt it would turn out to be one of those weeks, as well!

* * *

"Howzaboutit?" Kaolla asked as she moved away from the keyboard, mouse and gestured at the monitor she had blocked by sitting so close to it that her nose was in constant danger of making contact with it.

The mecha-tama waddled over and looked speculatively at the screen, trying to find fault with what was being displayed on it.

The slowly twirling 3D representation of what Kaolla had in mind for the new body instantly had the mecha-tama's utter, complete and full attention as it closely scrutinized its creator's idea of Keitaro's Ultimate Sexual Fantasy woman.

The hair was irrefutably Sarah's, made up as it was in two blonde pig-tails which reached down to the hips of the slowly spinning figure. It did have those two Naru-antennae's sticking out of it, however. The large, kind and welcoming eyes came from Shinobu, no denying that. The rest of the face was a near carbon-copy of Naru's, other then the eyes and a mark on the middle of the forehead which came from Kaolla. Hanging from a corner of its mouth, was a smoking cigarette, which was obviously Haruka's contribution. The breasts were Mutsumi's, no doubt about that either. The legs, long, slender and nicely toned, came from Motoko. Crowning those gorgeous legs, were Kitsune's incredibly sculpted ass. The colouration of the figure's skin, was Kaolla's, giving it a nice golden tan.

"167 centimetres long, 90-58-83..." the mecha-tama stated and tapped one of its metal paws on Kaolla's desk in an absent distracted manner. "Make it 95-58-85. Those girls will be growing, I won't. That way, I should be able to keep Master happy for the rest of his life." the robot ordered and stopped tapping the desk, then looked at the monitor again before it turned to face Kaolla. "Why are you part of Masters sexual fantasies? Are you a threat to my relationship with Master, Creator?" the mecha-tama sternly inquired.

"Ah? Hehehehe..." Kaolla chuckled nervously. "Well, everybody else got to contribute something and I didn't want to be left out." Kaolla said and the robot mulled that over for a few moments, before it nodded in apparent satisfaction.

"Well, start building me this body with my modifications, Creator. I can't wait until I can show it to Master!" the mecha-tama approved and clutched its clumsy paws in front of its wide chest, letting out a metallic sigh. "Master is so wonderful..." it gushed and Kaolla made silent gagging motions when the robot was turned away from her.

Sure, she liked Keitaro as well, but this buggy mecha was taking it a little bit too far and seemed horribly inclined to utter the sappiest things imaginable.

Kaolla sighed and moved over to the computer again, making a few modifications that made the chest larger and hips wider. After the mecha-tama made a few additional suggestions, Kaolla was finally staring at a naked female body that made even her squirm a bit in her seat. She swallowed nervously and absently licked her lips. Well, if this didn't get Keitaro going on all eight cylinders, she'd have to start looking into building something that could turn gay men straight, or all her own plans for their joint future would go down the drain.

* * *

"You're getting sloppy, Tsuruko-han. Can't keep your mind off that husband of yours or are you looking forward to the annual training journey to the mountains?" Aoyama Yuriko inquired as she ducked underneath a swipe from Tsuruko, then lashed out with her bokken at the back of Tsuruko's knees, toppling the younger and taller woman to the ground, where she landed on her ass with a pained grunt. Yuriko spun around and trust her bokken forward, halting it just millimetres away from Tsuruko's throat. "Youth... It's the bane of focus and concentration." Yuriko snorted and took a step back, looking sternly down at her eldest granddaughter. "What is on your mind, Tsuruko-han?"

"Motoko-han." Tsuruko replied as she slowly got back onto her feet, dusting herself off.

"Ah, our wayward little kitten." Yuriko commented with a faint smile. "She is often on your mind these days, Tsuruko-han. Why don't you go see her?" she suggested. "Perhaps ask if she would be willing to join us for the training journey." Yuriko further hinted with a gentle smile.

"I shouldn't have to go see her! Motoko-han belongs here, with me! Uh, with us. With us." Tsuruko snapped, but hastily collected herself and took a deep breath to regain her calm. "The date approaches when she will officially take her place as the Heir of the Shinmei Ryu. She should be here with us, learning as much as she possibly can. Not wasting time in Tokyo." Tsuruko continued.

"Seat yourself, Tsuruko-han." Yuriko suggested and nodded at the ground, slowly lowering herself to her knees and putting her bokken down next to her. "We will discuss your lack of focus and concentration later. Your skills are second to none! Indeed, you may very well be the most talented swords mistress to ever practise our Art. But while you have mastered the sword, you have yet to master yourself. A problem which you share with your sister, by the way. But more about that later" Yuriko explained as Tsuruko kneeled down in front of her grandmother with a contrite expression on her face.

"I am sorry, grandmother." Tsuruko apologised.

"As well you should be, Tsuruko-han. It has been quite some time since I last laid you out without a scratch on me. I believe you were barely thirteen at the time. Fourteen years have passed since and your skills have developed nicely over those years. For you to fail so utterly in a simple spar is disgraceful." Yuriko stated and Tsuruko nodded her agreement.

"See? This is why Motoko-han should be here! I am not suited for this position!" Tsuruko exclaimed.

"And you believe Motoko-han is?" Yuriko inquired with a gentle smile. "She is eleven years your junior, Tsuruko-han. Do you truly believe she is ready for the responsibility now?" she asked and Tsuruko looked hesitant for a few moments, before she slowly nodded, but she didn't look all that sure of herself. "If Motoko were to master the sword, I would agree that this would be the better place for it. But it is far more important for Motoko to master herself, then the sword, if she is to take her place as Heir to our school. Only when she has mastered herself, can she begin to master the sword and only then, will she be ready."

"Can't she master herself here as well?" Tsuruko asked.

"Did you?" Yuriko inquired and smiled. "Go see your sister, Tsuruko-han. See for yourself how she is doing. Ease your mind and banish your worries."

"I have to discuss matters with my husband before leaving, but I may just do that." Tsuruko replied after a few moments.

"Invite that young lady to our annual training journey. You're not the only one who misses her." Yuriko suggested. "And tell that young lady that it's not against the law to call or write her dear old grandmother from time to time." she added with a displeased grunt.

"I will tell her, grandmother." Tsuruko replied with a faint smile and grinned as she came up with an idea that pleased her. She would give her little sister somewhat of a scare, pretending that it was time for her to return to Kyoto to become the Heir.

Motoko had always been so easily flustered.

Tsuruko chuckled to herself, until she cut herself off with a pained whimper as Yuriko brought her bokken down on top of Tsuruko's head.

"Focus, Tsuruko-han! Now when the sappy trite nonsense has been dealt with, we will discuss the matter of your atrocious self-control, lack of focus and the ease by which you can be distracted!" Yuriko snapped and Tsuruko instantly devoted all her attention to her stern grandmother, letting out a mental sigh as she prepared herself for one long afternoon lecture about the importance of focus and concentration.

She couldn't wait to see her sister again and her mind was awash with what sort of stunt dear Motoko-han might attempt to get out of having to go back to Kyoto with her.

"Ow!" Tsuruko exclaimed as the bokken made another appearance on the top of her head.

"Focus!" Yuriko repeated.

"Yes, sensei!" Tsuruko agreed in a loud and clear voice as she made yet another attempt to clear her mind of all distractions, so she could devote her full attention to Yuriko before the old woman started striking harder then she already was to get Tsuruko's attention.

The End! ( For now... )


End file.
